Premortal life
It all starts out in the premortal life, I was waiting and excited and voted to follow Christ and gain a body and be tested and then I think I stopped paying attention and probably got side tracked by something when the instructions were given to line up and pick your family. Well knowing my personality I probably was so excited to come to earth that I just picked whatever line was the shortest and jumped in line with 3vother crazy spirits not paying attention either. I am sure we had a good time in our short line laughing and making jokes about the idiots in the long lines that are going to be waiting a while, then we were sent down to our family 4 crazy spirits sent down at different times to the same mom. Well 30+ years go by and we say to ourselves what the heck were we thinking when we picked our family? We really should of been paying attention and not so impatient to jump in the short and undesireable line. Well we are dysfunctional here on earth but we at least got a mom who loves us and well we are lost but we have a Savior to save us, so we are good, we will just keep pushing along and try to make it the best even though sometimes we just want to give up and or get away from eachother, we are all we got so we live with it and still haven't learned our lesson on paying any attention on whats going on. Wish us all luck!
This is what I imiagine happened in a funny way, but I am sure its not what really happened, we probably drew the short straw...ha haha just kidding. My purpose of writing this story is to share my experiences here on this earth and hopefully my challenges will become stepping stones closer to my savior and heavenly father, and if they help you throught your journey well step on and push forward with me!
1980 my mom gets knocked up in a one night stand with a friend of hers who is married and has children. My mom promised him she would keep the baby a secret and never let the child find out or anyone else. So she marries Steve and calls him the father. Now my dad had a vasectomy 4 years before I was conceived so I am not sure why he went along with the story but he did. They married again and soon I was to be born. Once my grandma (my moms mom) found out my mother was pregnant with her 4th child my grandmother insisted that my mom have another abortion. Yes that is right my mom got pregnant 4 years before I was born with my dads child and at the time he was married and had 4 other kids and his current wife was also pregnant, yep white trash before I was even born, said in a hillbilly voice! So my grandmother insisted on my mom having a abortion since the sperm donor was married to another woman and my mother was doing a poor job at raising her other 2 children. With a lot of push and shove my mom went through with it and got the abortion, it was a boy she found out after the abortion. My mom was heartbroken she never forgot the pain and guilt from aborting her baby. So fast forward 4 years she gets knocked up again and was prompted to have a abortion again since she in not a fit mother and my mom just couldn't do it, she couldn't live with the first mistake she made so she did what her hormonal self thought was right at the moment so she lied to my dad and said it was his, he did divorce his wife and my mom and dad were married not blissfully married but married. Well she probably was thinking since she had to abort the previous baby which was his then this might as well be the second chance, who knows.
So I am born, thank goodness my mom didn't go through with my grandmas plan! I was born and placed in those other crazy spirits home, at the time my brother was a teenager and didn't like his step dad and my sister was 10 and was abused and had to be put in foster care, so we were not to functional but we made it! My brother married when he was 16 and so did my sister so I do not remember living with them. My parents fought so much and they were abusive and alcholics they really didn't like eachother and had many problems, one as you can imagine was staying faithful to eachother.
When I was 5 years old my dad would take me to his mistress house which was next door to us and I would be left with her perverted kids and witness the adult action between my dad and his girlfriend. I didn't like it at all, I hated being there and all I can remember is very bad images. My mom also had a boyfriend while married and he was a truck driver so I didn't see him as often but when I did it was no secret they were excited to see eachother. My parents would fight in front of me and yell and my dad was very physical abusive and I remember him hitting my mom across the room and she got pretty banged up. On another occasion of them fighting my mom pulled out a gun in front of me and told my dad she is going to shoot him and then shoot herself, yep that one is never to be forgotten either. My sister pulled me out of the house thankfully she was around at that time and no one was shot but later divorce happened.
I am now 7 and at this time my parents were unfaithful and I was there to see it all happen, then they fought like crazy and then they got a divorce. When my dad left my mom and I were alone in the house, my mom couldn't pay the bills so we lived in a house without power and waited for the bank to come and kick us out any day. My mom would leave for the bars as soon as I was asleep, she would head out to the eagles club and meet her truck driver boyfriend when he was in town. She would stay out all night and I would wake up scared in the middle of the night and she was not there. I would cry because I was scared of the dark and all alone. I would call my mom at the bar, yes I had the number memorized from calling so much, I would call every night and sometimes she would talk to me and tell me to go back to sleep and some nights she would say tell her I am not here but I could hear her in the background. I would wait for her to get home and when she did she would come home puking all night in the toilet and I was so scared for her that she was going to die, I didn't realize it was because of the alcohol I thought she was sick and dying. She would yell at me to go back to bed and when her gross boyfriend was in town he would tell me to get to sleep and he was really drunk he couldn't even walk straight. So I would go to sleep frightened and crying and praying that my mom would be ok. After the throwing up session I would hear them in the next room being very intimate and loud about it. I was so grossed out and hated her boyfriend, my mom always treated me like crap when she had a man in her life, and I hated it.
Well I am not sure how my attitude was at this time but I can draw you a picture, here is a 7 year old girl whos parents just divorced, she never sees her father and she has a mother who is always leaving her to go tot he bars and sometimes out on truck with her boyfriend, and I was left all alone, I hated my moms boyfriends and I am sure I was unhappy and cried a lot. I never went to school because my mom didn't make me and I always was made fun of because I smelt bad like cigarette smoke. So my mom has me admitted to a mental health hospital, charter canyon. One morning I wake up and my stuff is packed and my mom tells me to get in this nice ladies car because I am going to go to the hospital where she went when she had a mental breakdown when she was married to my dad. So I start to cry and I don't want to leave my mom, I loved her she was my mom and she was the only thing I had. I couldn't leave my mom alone I was the only one who loved her and took care of her. Well I was forced into the car and taken to charter canyon, I had no idea what I did wrong? Why was I getting punished for my mom and dads mistakes?
This is what I imiagine happened in a funny way, but I am sure its not what really happened, we probably drew the short straw...ha haha just kidding. My purpose of writing this story is to share my experiences here on this earth and hopefully my challenges will become stepping stones closer to my savior and heavenly father, and if they help you throught your journey well step on and push forward with me!
1980 my mom gets knocked up in a one night stand with a friend of hers who is married and has children. My mom promised him she would keep the baby a secret and never let the child find out or anyone else. So she marries Steve and calls him the father. Now my dad had a vasectomy 4 years before I was conceived so I am not sure why he went along with the story but he did. They married again and soon I was to be born. Once my grandma (my moms mom) found out my mother was pregnant with her 4th child my grandmother insisted that my mom have another abortion. Yes that is right my mom got pregnant 4 years before I was born with my dads child and at the time he was married and had 4 other kids and his current wife was also pregnant, yep white trash before I was even born, said in a hillbilly voice! So my grandmother insisted on my mom having a abortion since the sperm donor was married to another woman and my mother was doing a poor job at raising her other 2 children. With a lot of push and shove my mom went through with it and got the abortion, it was a boy she found out after the abortion. My mom was heartbroken she never forgot the pain and guilt from aborting her baby. So fast forward 4 years she gets knocked up again and was prompted to have a abortion again since she in not a fit mother and my mom just couldn't do it, she couldn't live with the first mistake she made so she did what her hormonal self thought was right at the moment so she lied to my dad and said it was his, he did divorce his wife and my mom and dad were married not blissfully married but married. Well she probably was thinking since she had to abort the previous baby which was his then this might as well be the second chance, who knows.
So I am born, thank goodness my mom didn't go through with my grandmas plan! I was born and placed in those other crazy spirits home, at the time my brother was a teenager and didn't like his step dad and my sister was 10 and was abused and had to be put in foster care, so we were not to functional but we made it! My brother married when he was 16 and so did my sister so I do not remember living with them. My parents fought so much and they were abusive and alcholics they really didn't like eachother and had many problems, one as you can imagine was staying faithful to eachother.
When I was 5 years old my dad would take me to his mistress house which was next door to us and I would be left with her perverted kids and witness the adult action between my dad and his girlfriend. I didn't like it at all, I hated being there and all I can remember is very bad images. My mom also had a boyfriend while married and he was a truck driver so I didn't see him as often but when I did it was no secret they were excited to see eachother. My parents would fight in front of me and yell and my dad was very physical abusive and I remember him hitting my mom across the room and she got pretty banged up. On another occasion of them fighting my mom pulled out a gun in front of me and told my dad she is going to shoot him and then shoot herself, yep that one is never to be forgotten either. My sister pulled me out of the house thankfully she was around at that time and no one was shot but later divorce happened.
I am now 7 and at this time my parents were unfaithful and I was there to see it all happen, then they fought like crazy and then they got a divorce. When my dad left my mom and I were alone in the house, my mom couldn't pay the bills so we lived in a house without power and waited for the bank to come and kick us out any day. My mom would leave for the bars as soon as I was asleep, she would head out to the eagles club and meet her truck driver boyfriend when he was in town. She would stay out all night and I would wake up scared in the middle of the night and she was not there. I would cry because I was scared of the dark and all alone. I would call my mom at the bar, yes I had the number memorized from calling so much, I would call every night and sometimes she would talk to me and tell me to go back to sleep and some nights she would say tell her I am not here but I could hear her in the background. I would wait for her to get home and when she did she would come home puking all night in the toilet and I was so scared for her that she was going to die, I didn't realize it was because of the alcohol I thought she was sick and dying. She would yell at me to go back to bed and when her gross boyfriend was in town he would tell me to get to sleep and he was really drunk he couldn't even walk straight. So I would go to sleep frightened and crying and praying that my mom would be ok. After the throwing up session I would hear them in the next room being very intimate and loud about it. I was so grossed out and hated her boyfriend, my mom always treated me like crap when she had a man in her life, and I hated it.
Well I am not sure how my attitude was at this time but I can draw you a picture, here is a 7 year old girl whos parents just divorced, she never sees her father and she has a mother who is always leaving her to go tot he bars and sometimes out on truck with her boyfriend, and I was left all alone, I hated my moms boyfriends and I am sure I was unhappy and cried a lot. I never went to school because my mom didn't make me and I always was made fun of because I smelt bad like cigarette smoke. So my mom has me admitted to a mental health hospital, charter canyon. One morning I wake up and my stuff is packed and my mom tells me to get in this nice ladies car because I am going to go to the hospital where she went when she had a mental breakdown when she was married to my dad. So I start to cry and I don't want to leave my mom, I loved her she was my mom and she was the only thing I had. I couldn't leave my mom alone I was the only one who loved her and took care of her. Well I was forced into the car and taken to charter canyon, I had no idea what I did wrong? Why was I getting punished for my mom and dads mistakes?
I'm sorry I didn't know all the times you were alone. We did move you over with us. I love you.
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